10 Practical Ways To Stop Involving Yourself With Negative Things

10 Practical ways to stop involving yourself with Negative Things

Good morning guys, trust your night and weekend was great. Welcome to a week of productivity and results.

I was going through my pad and sae this old post I initially wanted to post but probably forgot. It’s a post originally written by Brianna Weist

1. Be with people you can be honest around, or don’t be around them at all.

If you trace the beginnings of the ends of any relationships you’ve been in, I guarantee it probably had something to do with someone cutting off honesty and/or communication. (The two go hand-in-hand.)
The second you cannot say to someone “I think what you’re doing is wrong,” “I’m upset with how you’re treating me,” “I’m scared and here’s why,” “I’m having doubts and these are what they are,” or “I love you but I don’t love this thing you do,” is the second it’s going to fail.
You end up expending all of your energy pretending to be someone you’re not, and it’s not helping anybody. Only ever telling people what they want to hear verbally placates them into their same old habits, their same old ways, and nothing changes. This doesn’t mean you have to be rude. This doesn’t mean to throw effective, healthy communication out the window; there’s a difference.
If you cannot be honest with someone and have your thoughts and opinions heard, be around other people who you can. They’re out there.
If you pretend for long enough, you only end up losing yourself.

2. Stop keeping things in your life because you just don’t want to go through the stress or discomfort of letting them go.

Up to and including: friends you don’t genuinely want to spend time with, on-again-off-again flings that won’t amount to anything other than your own pain, exchanges that leave you exhausted and frustrated, resentment over things you can’t change, subscriptions to magazines that make you hate yourself, social media connections that do not add anything to your day, the phone numbers of the people you always have to text first (if at all) and love for the people who will never love you back.

3. Stop ruminating on the old and start building the new.

The second a negative thought or crippling memory crops up, don’t entertain it and allow yourself to sink further down the rabbit hole of all things could-have-been and should-have-been. Analyze what about the situation makes you uncomfortable, and figure out how you can apply what you wish you would have done to your life now. Don’t just “vow” to be different, figure out how you can actively, consciously do so. If you apply it correctly, it’s the healthiest, most effective coping mechanism around.

4. Play by the “if you’re going to forget about it in a year from now, don’t waste your energy worrying about it now” rule.

If you look back on your life, you will probably realize that you have mentally divided it into segments during which you worried compulsively about the outcome of something that either worked itself out or wouldn’t matter in a relatively short period of time.
Simply: if you look back, you’ll realize that no feeling was ever final, and you wasted your time concerning yourself with issues that weren’t either.
It’ll give you the perspective to work cultivating that mindset now, before you’re looking back on these years and thinking the same things.

5. Don’t allow your “no” to be the beginning of a negotiation.

You get as much respect as you demand. You teach people how to treat you. If you don’t feel that your wants or needs are being understood or respected, find a way to communicate them better, and then learn what it means for you to draw lines — even if that’s as serious as completely walking away. It’s not a matter of giving up easily, it’s a matter of knowing what you’re not going to permit.

6. There’s not one person on this planet that’s like, “yeah, this is exactly how I thought it would go.” Stop projecting a future based on what you believe in now.

The unknown is scary. So scary, in fact, that we decide things about our futures based on what we can conceive of being possible now, and the fault in this is that we get attached to an outcome that isn’t necessarily most right for us.
We tend to be surprised by what we get in place of what we thought we wanted. Even the concept of relinquishing future control just comes across as another elusive platitude, but it’s really, really important. It’s the only way to free yourself from impending suffering.

7. Learn what it means to view everything objectively, in light of what it will ultimately amount to in the bigger picture.

This whole world isn’t indebted to you, but nor is it out to get you. People aren’t usually “against” things, they’re just for themselves. People think of you far less than you worry about them doing so. Your perspective is just one of them. You are a speck in the span of infinity. Remember how small you are.

8. Don’t expect to receive that which you don’t communicate you want.

You get what you have the courage to ask for.

9. Don’t let one thing define you.

There is not one decision or day or instance that makes you who you are. You are what you repeatedly do. The only thing that isn’t normal is to pretend that you never struggle, have never suffered, never feel anything but happiness, etc. You’re supposed to ebb and flow, you shouldn’t want it any other way. It means you’re alive, you’re invested in things that matter, you made mistakes but you made an effort regardless, and you’re not emotionally or otherwise stunted, as would be the case if you didn’t feel remorse or sadness or grief.

10. Realize that the problem is always you.

Now that sounds harsh, and I imagine a slew of you will want to rise and disagree, and I get that, but to be really honest with you, that’s the problem.

Here’s the thing: you are the only thing you can control. If you are upset with a situation, you cannot force people into changing to suit your wants and needs, so you have to change what you can control: whether or not you’re removing yourself from it, asserting yourself, or changing your mindset about how you’re going to approach it.

If you aren’t doing so — the problem is you.

Feel free to share and repost on your platform. Also don’t forget to drop your comments.

The Trade

He stepped off of His throne,
So glorious above,
For no other reason,
But to shine forth His love.

The angels in awe,
Bending knee at the sight,
Of the King of Creation,
Robed in radiant light.

But the splendor displayed,
On His heavenly throne,
Was eclipsed by the sight,
Of humility shown.

He walked the earth as a Servant,
Humbled Himself as a man,
As angels looked on, in stunned disbelief,
At the wonder of God’s ancient plan.

Drowning in thick darkness,
Sinking deep into the mire,
We were blown along, so foolishly,
By selfish and sinful desire.

Out of the darkness and tempest,
Out of affliction and pain,
Along came the Prince of Righteousness,
To redeem us from sin and from shame.

The weight of the cross was much lighter,
Than the price of our sins He would pay,
For redemption from, our myriad sins,
Could only be purchased one way.

Why He would show such great mercy,
To ones so unworthy as we,
Will remain the age-old question,
A part of God’s grand mystery.

Why

Why is Christ worthy to be called the Lord?
With wide wonder I ponder the ways;
He’s the Prince of Peace and Lord of Life
Who with fervor goes after the strays.

Why do I love the Savior so?
Oh the ways are too numerous to count;
Were the whole world mine as a gift to give
It would be an insufficient amount.

Why do I cling to my Saviors side
Forsaking things I once held dear?
It’s because I’ve found Someone of infinite worth
The Great Savior who saved me from fear.

Why do I follow a God I can’t see,
And seek to walk in His steps?
It’s because He’s exceedingly gracious to me
I’m a child that He loves and accepts.

Why do I think the great God and King
Would lavish such favor on to me?
It’s a question I still often ask myself
Why He’d die to set my soul free.

Why do I choose to live a life
That could lead to much suffering and pain?
It’s because this world is not my home
And to suffer for Christ is great gain.

Why do I believe that Christ the Lord
Can cleanse the most sin stained hearts?
It’s because He truly has done it for me
By the mercy and grace He imparts.

Why do I hope in a life without end
With no death, sorrow, suffering nor pain?
Because Jesus has gone to prepare a place
In which peace, love and righteousness reign.

3 Questions To Confirming Your Purpose

Hey guys, thanks for stopping by.

Today I will be pointing out 3 questions to confirming your purpose.

real success story in the mountain,sport couple woman with successful with sunset

Purpose is the feeling of having a definite aim and of being determined to achieve it. A very important thing you want to achieve in life.

Living a life without regret is a universal desire. I’ve had too many sleepless nights around the question, “is this it?” I’ve worked hard… and even had some great achievements, but at times, I’m still troubled by the missed opportunities, the things I’ve never said, the trips I never took, or decisions I’ve failed to make. This is regret.

It’s the feeling of missing out. It can sap your passion, poison your future, and even have an effect on those around you. It leads me to this positive thought:

“In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take.”

But in the end, we can’t do it all. We all realize life is moving faster and faster to our final day – and we understand a life without regret is impractical, but how do we live life with less regret? How can we chase our dreams, live our passion, and love our lives all at the same time?

3 Critical Questions to Confirming Your Purpose:

  1. What are you most passionate about? – (Design and Creativity, Charity, Tutor, Entrepreneurship, Etc.)
  2. Who’s most important to you? (Spouse, Best Friend, Cousin, Parents, Children, Strangers, Etc.)
  3. Where is your favorite place on earth? (NYC, Spain, Canada, Australia, Hawaii, Your Home, Church, Etc.)

If you’re doing what you’re passionate about, with the people most important to you, in place that excites you, you are living the dream.

Now, it’s up to you to not only answer these questions but to make at least one of them happen this year… because remember, in the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take.

Let’s hear from you in our comment section.

Have a productive day!

Not In Vain

What I once thought an exhausting wrestling match
I now see as God’s loving embrace,
I once thought it was I holding on for dear life
I now see I am held by God’s grace.

For so many years I’ve cried torrents of tears
And thought they were poured out in vain,
But God stored each one up in a bottle
And used anguish of soul for great gain.

So please dear Christian don’t give up
Even when things seem hopeless and dark,
For Christ can set the whole world ablaze,
With a smoldering wick and one spark.

You Will Never Always Be Motivated, So You Must Learn To Be Disciplined

Hi guys, thanks for dropping by.

I congratulate you again for making it into 2019. We will accomplish greatness this year. But it won’t just come like that, we have to be disciplined to be motivated to accomplish every goal written for this year.

motivation GIF
Don’t limit yourself this year, try and break the boiling point
motivational discipline GIF
Make sure whatever you want to become in life as a person, you need to be persistent and be ready for any hurdles along the way because challenges will surely come. So be ready to take charge and follow the right path
motivational you can do it GIF
If you dream whatever you want to do, you can surely put it into action and make it a reality
cat motivation GIF
Don’t just dream it, work on it
king of queens running GIF by TV Land
You can do it

Have a wonderful day.

What Are You Grateful For This Year

This year is such a blessing for me. God truly answers prayers, He never fails.

Am grateful to God for the gift of life and saving me from death traps during my traveling.

Am thankful and grateful to God for my family and friends that stood by me this year.

Am grateful to God for Good Health and sound mind.

Am grateful to God this year, allowing me to marry my best friend and Queen this year.

Am grateful to God for providing for my needs.

Am thankful and grateful to all of you reading my blog, and my community members. You guys are my professional colleagues. Thank you for everything have learnt from you guys this year.

Am grateful for the word of God. A-side the persecutitof Christians around the world, the gospel is still spreading very fast.

Am grateful for my country Nigeria. With the difficulties and economic downfall. God still kept us moving and alive.

Am grateful for my place of work and the favour and protection God gave to me.

We all have something to be grateful for this year. If you don’t have anything, just look at the way you breathing and alive. If you feel you asked God for something and you didn’t get it. Don’t fret and be dissapointed, God will surprise you in 2019 in Jesus name.

I love you guys, see you in 2019

Happy New Year in advance…

Your Past Is Not Your Future

wake up success GIF by Interstellardesignz

Many people had difficult experiences growing up. They fell on hard times and became associated with the wrong people. I am a perfect example of this, after giving up on writing different exams to enter the university, I was miserable at home. It led me to different bad kinds of stuff like following the wrong set of people, I stole, and was very rude and disrespect my mum.

Anyways let us go on with the main reason for this post.

Some people were convicted for their crimes after behaving in ways that were illegal or socially unacceptable. Thank God I wasn’t…

They thought seriously about the kind of person they wanted to be known as, and thought of, in the future. They decided to change their lives by changing the values that they lived by. By making these decisions and sticking to them, they changed their lives. And what others have done, you can do as well.

Remember: It doesn’t matter where you’re coming from; all that really matters is where you’re going.

If you were an outstanding person in every respect, how would you behave toward others? What sort of impression would you leave on others after you had met them and spoken with them? Imagine you could be a completely excellent person. How would you be different from who you are today?

Please drop your comment and contribution to this post.

Have a blessed day!

Determine Your Heart’s Desire

Beauty happy girl with Valentine gift box.In his book “The Importance of Discovering Your Hearts Desire”, Emmet Fox wrote What is your heart’s desire? What is it that, deep down in your heart, more than anything else, you would like to be, have, or do in life? A s a friend of mine asks, “What do you want to be famous for?”

What words would you like people to use to describe you when you are not there? When you gone, what will you like people to say at your funeral? How would you want your family, friends, and children to remember you? How would you like people to talk to them about you?

What kind of a reputation do you have today? What kind of a reputation would you like to have sometime in the future? What would you have to begin doing today in order to create the kind of reputation that you desire?

A Whisper Or A Shout


Before I spoke my Savior heard
My earnest and heartfelt plea,
Jesus save me I’m drowning in sin!
And that cry changed my life’s destiny.
Men argue and debate mankind’s state and fate
Who and what we should trust and believe,
But this I know in my heart and soul
It’s Christ’s grace we all need to receive,
So if you’ve hit the bottom of the pit
Seeing no hope or earthly way out,
The Savior stands ready and listens to all

To a whisper- as well as a shout…

To Avoid Embarrassment And Unnecessary Pressure

Hi guys, thanks for stopping by to this straight forward post. It has come to my knowledge people go the extreme to do things above their means.

Here are some solutions to avoid it..

  • Put your kids in schools you can afford because expensive schools doesn’t guarantee good results. Just ensure they attend a good affordable school.
  • Rent apartments you can pay for conveniently. Don’t live in a house you struggle to pay yearly.
  • A man whose wife is pregnant has good 9 months to prepare, so also the pregnant woman in question. They should even plan for the worse and only seek help when they can’t meet up.
  • Some problems in our lives don’t just pop up, 12 months ago, we knew we would pay rents…So its not an emergency.
  • Let’s plan our lives and live within our means. Save more and spend less.
  • Some women buy food for their children every morning before going to school, do you know it’s cheaper to cook at home?
  • Some buy every Asoebi and also buy shoe and bag to match.
  • Some people who don’t earn much, but have DSTV at home, go for GOTV and upgrade when your income upgrades. It’s still the same CNN.
  • Eat healthy meals and protect your family from mosquitoes to avoid going to the hospital always.
  • Take advantage of food and fruits in season, its cheaper and you can be creative to create amazing meals.
  • Don’t copy your neighbor’s style of cooking soup, she earns well and her husband is a ‘big man’
  • Don’t follow trends, wear clean well-ironed clothes and keep your hair neat. You would still look good.
  • Keep your circle small, keep only friends that have senses!
  • Above all things, have the fear of God, have integrity, don’t be lazy and be prayerful.
  • Planning is the key, if you fail to plan, you plan to FAIL
  • God bless us all and provide all our needs.

The Situation Analysis Of Life

After Secondary School..
All your classmates have gone in different directions in the world.

Some have completed universities and are now:
Doctors,
Engineers,
Teachers,
Pilots,
Lawyers,
Administrators, etc.

Some are married,
Some have given birth,
Some are still searching and waiting on the Lord.
Some are dead, don’t forget that too.

And others are on the sick bed,
Some are running their higher degrees: Masters, PHD, etc.

Some haven’t even gained admission into the tertiary institution and may NEVER be able to.

Some own companies,
Some are now Directors and major shareholders in global companies.

But how do you feel
When you meet your classmates, and it seems like he/she has accomplished their dreams and you’re not yet close to yours?
So many thoughts run through your mind, right?
First, you think God has not been fair to you.

How about the ones you meet on the street wearing dirty cloths and still struggling for survival ?
Do you get the same thoughts running through your mind?
I guess, NO.

Don’t forget too that some are already dead.
Somehow it feels natural to have that feeling of jealous for those mates who seem better off, but it is really unnecessary.

There is no room for regrets,
We are all different and our paths to greatness are also not the same in distance.

Some might have arrived earlier before you and some after you, but whatever level you find yourself in life,
Please keep trying to break limitations and move further.

Celebrate the success of others, its an indication that yours too shall surely come.

Your friend buys a car now, be happy with him/ her.
Remember when you’ll buy yours,
theirs might not be the latest again.
There’s no permanent champion, but current champion.

Life is not about competition, do not be in a race with anyone; remember, we may seem to be reading the same book but different chapters at different times.

Don’t let the passion in you kill the desire in you, keep it burning.

What you’re passing through today;
Write it down because one day the world would be ready to read it, they’ll become part of your success story.

There’s no height you cannot attain, believe in yourself, define your goals, recognize distractions and don’t stop striving.

Spend time teaching yourself, because those things that mainly take people to the top are the things they devoted their time to develop.

Don’t be intimidated by your friend’s success, the sky is wide enough for birds to fly without touching one another.

Value every little thing that God brings into your life, love God and obey Him.
For with God, all things are possible.

Now to those who are on top Never forget to give a helping hand to those who are down. Because Life is full of uncertainties; the one you pull up today, may be the one to hold your hands and prevent you from falling tomorrow

A piece of advice there, food for thought

Please share, comment and like this to all your friends and let them realize that God has a purpose in their lives.

God bless you.

How to Motivate Yourself – 5 Steps to Turn Your Power On!

Don’t wear a bullet proof because am about to shoot 5 steps for how to motivate yourself.

1. Your Reality Stocktake

Grab a pen and paper. You’re about to get real with yourself!

Answer these questions:

  • What price are you paying for doing nothing and staying where you are? There are costs involved! The clearer you are on that, the more uncomfortable you will be about it. The more uncomfortable you are, the more motivated you will be to do something to change it!
  • What are you missing out on by not taking action and creating the outcomes you want? There is something great available to you if only you would go for it. The clearer you are about that, the more disappointed you will feel if you don’t get up and get after it. The more disappointed you are, the more motivated you will be to get in action!

The point is this – you want to feel a little pain here.

Pain is motivating.

There is NO VALUE in pretending that there is no price you’re paying and there is nothing you’re missing out on.

Getting real with yourself is a powerful starting point for powering up.

2. Time to Raise Your Standards

If you’re not motivated, chances are you are TOO comfortable where you stand.

If that is true, it means you are too accepting of your current situation and the price you’re paying. And, you’re okay to some extent with missing out on what else is available in your life.

This means your standards are too low. You unconsciously (or consciously!) expect less for yourself than you really deserve.

To have what you want, you need to raise your standards and get emotionally convicted about the fact you DON’T DESERVE to stay stuck and pay these prices. And, that you DO DESERVE better for yourself.

3. Draw a Line in the Sand

Getting motivated and staying motivated requires that you say, “Enough is enough.”

I like to call this – putting a line in the sand.

You draw a line, you step over it, and you say, “I’m never going back.”

One big problem people face with motivation is that it ebbs and flows, and they yo-yo in and out of it. This means you never really get lasting change or the results you want.

To get lasting change means being consistent. Consistently motivated. Consistently clear. Consistently in action.

If you don’t put a line in the sand and step over it permanently, then it means that in your mindset you are allowing yourself permission to yo-yo.

If you start out on a path of action or change with the intention that it’s okay to stop whenever you want, then guess what . . . you will!

Instead, create a mindset that says, “I’m not turning back. I’m motivated and I’m sticking with this. I’m never going back. I don’t deserve back there. I do deserve what’s ahead.”

No one can inject you with the sustainable motivation you need. They can amp you up for a short period of time. But hyped up energy taken from someone else never lasts!

The way to get lasting motivation, and motivation on the things that count, is to create it for yourself through a shift in your mind.

Learn how to use your mind and emotional system to your advantage, and you’ll finally feel like the master of your own destiny.

4. Your Mortality Reminder

You are not going to live forever. Fact.

You’ve used up some of your days already! Fact.

How many do you have left?

We don’t know. No one does.

This hopefully is a motivating factor for you!

When you remember that everyone ends up 6 feet under at some point, and you really dwell on the fact YOU will end up there too, it’s like having the electric shock paddles zapped on your heart. It jolts you to life!

The fact you’re reading this and thinking thoughts, and breathing, and working, and going about your daily life, DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE ALIVE.

Being truly alive is when you are consciously in control of yourself and owning your life.

5. Set the Structure

Most people struggle with motivation because they don’t have structure in place to help them STAY motivated.

Anyone can hype you up given the right insights and approach.

You can hype yourself up given the right tips and tools.

But hype is NOT genuine motivation.

Hype is what feels great and then fizzles out like a firework on a rainy night.

I want you to have lasting motivation, which means…

You need structure in place to not only lift up your motivation levels but to KEEP THEM UP.

The problem is – life is busy, demanding and noisy. There are always things to distract you. You might forget.

If your mindset isn’t finely tuned already, then you likely have your own inner blocks that will get in the way too (excuses, limiting beliefs, negative self-talk and so forth). But try pushing yourself and beating these obstacles and sure you will overcome.

Feeling motivated? I’d love to hear from you so please do head to the comments section below. Let me know what’s happening in your life right now!

Credit to Bernadette Logue

Repost: An Attitude Of Gratitude.

Originally posted on Everyday Answers.

Hi, thanks for stopping by to read my post today. I was surfing the internet and saw this beautiful piece, I couldn’t read it alone but to also share with you guys on my platform.

Most people would agree that we have a lot to be thankful for. After all, many of us live a lifestyle full of conveniences…

  • We live in comfortable homes, wear nice clothes, and have reliable transportation.
  • We have no shortage of clean water or healthy food.
  • We have access to quality healthcare and education, and basically live a good life with a lot of freedom, safety and security.

While it’s easy to take these wonderful blessings for granted—and begin to focus on what we don’t have—millions of people around the world live without the basic necessities of life.

I’ll never forget the time one of our sons went on a weekend outreach with a team of people to help the homeless. It was obvious that the experience touched him deeply. He called me and said:

“If I ever complain again, please knock me down for being so stupid!”

After he saw how some people were living, he was appalled at how he had complained about small things in his own life.

Just think about it…

We can complain about trivial things like cleaning the house. However, those without a place to live would love to have a house to clean.

Or have you ever complained about the regular costs of maintaining your vehicle? I’m sure we’ve all had our day ruined by an unexpected repair. However, a person without transportation dreamsabout having a car to drive.

It is so easy to forget how blessed we are! That’s why maintaining an attitude of gratitude is something we need to do on purpose.

This “little thing” can make a big difference…

I want you to try something. As you go about your day, make a point to be grateful for the things you may otherwise not even notice.

For instance, I really like coffee. Sometimes I take a moment in the morning to thank God for this “little thing” that brings me joy and comfort.

Or how about the blessing of having hot water? It’s something we can easily take for granted, but it makes our lives so much better!

As you begin to thank God for the seemingly small things in your life, it will help you to focus on the positive and everything you do have. As result, you will also be much happier!

Invite God into everything you do…

One of the best things we can do throughout the day is praise God while we work.

No matter what you’re trying to build—your home, your marriage, your business, financial security, or even an exercise plan—you can worship God as you work.

At my conferences, I make sure to be in the service as soon as the praise and worship begins because I love to be in God’s presence. In fact, before I speak to an audience, I make sure I have entered into praise and worship.

I want to fix my thoughts on God, thank Him for what He’s done in my life and for the words He’s giving me to speak, and I want to give Him praise for everything else He’s going to do.

We need to praise God because we love Him. It actually draws us closer to Him, which helps us hear the Word clearly, receive it, and hold on to it through faith.

This will help you to see more clearly…

Giving thanks throughout the day is simply a way to show God how grateful we are for who He is.

Regularly giving thanks to God not only helps us fully realize how He’s working in our lives, it gives us a new perspective—our mind is renewed, our attitude is improved, and we are filled with joy (see Psalm 16:11).

I am truly amazed at how two people can have the exact same circumstances, however one person can be negative, dissatisfied and hopeless while the other is optimistic and full of joy!

Praise makes all of the difference. Living life with a heart of gratitude for who God is and what He has done for us lifts our burdens and causes us to see everything in a different light.

Each moment that we’re given is a precious gift from God. We can choose to have a thankful attitude and live each moment full of joy…simply because God is good.

Please feel free to comment, like, and repost.

Know What You Really Want

Stephen Covey once said, “Be sure that, as you scramble up the ladder of success, it is leaning against the right building.” 

Many people work hard to achieve goals that they think they want only to find, at the end of the day, that they get no joy or satisfaction from their accomplishments. They ask, “Is this all there is?” This occurs when the outer accomplishment is not in harmony with your inner values. Don’t let this happen to you.

Socrates said, ” The unexamined life is not worth living.”

This applies to your values as much as to any other area of your life. Values clarification is something you do on a go- forward basis. You continually stop the clock, like a time out in a football game, and ask, “What are my values in this area?”

In Mathew 16:26, the Bible says, “What is a man profited if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?”

The happiest people in the world today are those who are living in harmony with their innermost convictions and values. The unhappiest people are those who are attempting to live in-congruent with what they truly value and believe.