Am sure this is not the first time you have come across this topic.
In an analysis of the members of the Forbes 400, the 400 richest men and women in the world today, researchers found that a person who dropped out of high school and who made it into the Forbes 400 was worth, on average, $1.2 Billion more than those who had completed college or university.
There are a record 2,208 billionaires in the world, according to Forbes’ 2018 rich list
The reason I mention this is because many people feel that if they didn’t get good grades in school they are permanently limited in what they can accomplish later in life. Nothing could be further from the truth. Some of the wealthiest, most successful men and women in the world, did poorly in school.
Remember the question, “How do you eat an elephant?” and the answer, “One bite at a time.” This is the same way that you become absolutely excellent at what you do. You move to the top one step, one skill, one small improvement at a time.
So what is your opinion on this topic today. Is having an education essential to success?
“Why am I not successful in what I am doing right now…” “I’m giving this everything I’ve got but it’s not working…” “I feel like I have been stuck here forever…”
If you are an individual that has been striving to live a successful life, then you have probably asked yourself similar questions to these along the way in your journey. This is a place that I have been familiar with in my life and it wasn’t until I started asking different questions that I began to receive answers. Once I realized that I was asking the wrong questions, I stopped and asked God what He thought of what I was doing to be successful…
“God, what is your success plan for my life?”
Have you ever stopped to think that what you are doing may not be what God has for you to do? Often we as believers forget that we are no longer our own. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) We may have our own plan and some things that we want to do. However, no matter how good our intentions may be, we need to remember that if we want to be successful in what we do then it needs to be God’s plan for us, not our own. I am not saying that the direction that you are going in is wrong. It may just be that you are focused on your own success and personal gain instead of the bigger picture of the success that God has for you.
Years ago in my personal life, I had a goal to have a certain amount of money in my bank account before being out of my early twenties. I had purchased and paid off a nice sports car, and owned rental property before the age of 21; things were on track and going very well. However, the economy took a very negative turn and messed up my plans. I realize now how unhappy I was through that season of my life, even when things were good; what was keeping me going was my drive to achieve my goals.
Since this time, I have grown up a lot and now understand what it means to follow God’s success plan for my life. Today, I can say to some extent am successful, not because I have that certain amount of money in my bank account, but because I am following God’s plan for my life. The craziest part about this is that the plan isn’t much different than my plan that I had for myself, what changed the most is my motivation and my reasoning for success. Now both of these things are God-focused instead of Alex focused.
As you go through your day, think about the goals you have set for yourself, and then surrender them to God. Know that the success that He has planned for you is far greater than what you have for yourself. Always remember that God will ensure success in accordance with His plan; not our own. Success is obtained by trusting God’s plan and surrendering our own. Success is obtained by trusting God’s plan and surrendering our own.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6
Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. Proverbs 16:3
We have all been there – in a tough situation that leaves you questioning everything and feeling empty.
Know that you are not alone.
Know that you have the strength and courage to get through this one day at a time. Keep your thoughts positive and your heart open. Be present and grow through this difficult experience.
How To Get Up When You’ve Been Knocked Down
Give yourself time to grieve: This is an important first step. Allow yourself time to feel all the mixed real emotions. Anger, sadness, confusion, disappointment, you might be feeling all these at once or going through a rollercoaster of emotions daily. That’s ok! If you need a personal day to yourself: take it! If you want to watch Netflix and eat ice cream one night: do it! It’s all part of healing. Be in tune with what your body needs and if you need a break, take it. Some distraction is helpful to allow yourself time to relax and de-stress.
Keep yourself open: Don’t curl up into a ball and hide, instead reach out to a close friend or family member and lean on him or her. They will help you make positive choices and will help you get back on your feet. They can mentor you on how to handle the next steps and encourage you to stay positive during this difficult time. Keep yourself open and vulnerable – don’t let this one setback affect your whole heart.
Take some time to cool off and reflect: You have been knocked down and it feels personal. Take some time before you respond or react. Acting out of passion and anger might seem like a good idea at the moment, but will only hurt you more in the long run. If you keep dwelling on this setback, it will only haunt you. Take a walk, put on some music, work on something that makes you happy, and allow yourself to take a mental break.
Setbacks can be a blessing: If you reflect and learn from your mistakes they can only make you stronger. Take responsibility and grow through the failure. Keep a journal and write down how you are feeling and what you are learning. “When we tackle obstacles, we find hidden reserves of courage and resilience we did not know we had. And it is only when we are faced with failure do we realize that these resources were always there within us. We only need to find them and move on with our lives.” -A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
Moving on and letting go are both necessary in healing: Think about it – you need to let go in order to move on and you can’t move on without really letting go. It takes time and self-reflection to bounce back. Allow yourself that time. This setback may not be resolved overnight and, depending on the situation, it may never fully go away. Unfortunately, you might not get the closure you need or deserve, but by understanding the situation and rising above it, you can find peace. You will heal and in time the emotions will settle and you will move on. Maybe you’ll look back and realize what happened was the best thing for you.
Keep moving forward and always choose the high road!
What would you pursue if it was somehow guaranteed that you would be successful?
What’s stopping you from going after your dreams?
If you’re like most other people, the answer is probably fear: fear that you won’t be good enough, you’ll never have enough money, fear that your efforts won’t be rewarded, and the list goes on.
Succumbing to fear is like living with a bad mental cold: it will clog you up and stop you from living your best life. Nothing blocks creativity and potential more than fear.
As human beings, it’s in our nature to avoid anything that causes us to feel fear or discomfort. We take mental and physical “detours” all the time, re-routing ourselves so we don’t have to face fear, and we do this so automatically that it often happens on a subconscious level.
In our fast-paced culture, we are very used to getting what we want quickly and conveniently. This has conditioned us to be a little wimpy—sometimes a lot wimpy.
The truth is, we usually give up way too quickly.
No one is immune to this fear. Let me use myself as an example: I love art, but I haven’t picked up a paintbrush in months. Why? Because I’m scared of failing! It seems like everywhere I look, I see incredible speed drawers, amazingly detailed paintings, and “how to” art videos that make the artist look like they’re not struggling with the creative process whatsoever. Now, when I sit down to paint a picture, spend 3 hours on it, and still don’t feel like it’s all that great, I get frustrated, ashamed, and fearful. So, I stop…and the fear of “what if I never get better” sets in, paralyzing me and causing me to reach for the TV remote instead of picking up a paintbrush, because that way I won’t be reminded of the fact that I’m not as good of an artist as I want to be.
The Vital Mindset Shift to Progress Your Life
However, I have learned something that I know from experience helps a great deal when pushing myself to grow, and that is having a growth mindset.
If you’ve never heard of it, a growth mindset is basically the opposite of a “fixed” mindset.
Growth Mindset:Believing that greater effort yields greater results. You get good at something because you work hard. Or, in the words of Einstein…
It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer – Albert Einstein.
Fixed Mindset:Believing that if someone is better than you at something, it must mean they were “born that way,” and there’s really nothing you can do about it. A fixed mindset would have you believe that your success and skills are “capped,” and you have all the talents now that you ever will.
Note: this is ALWAYS false—don’t fall for it!
2 Reasons to Choose a Growth Mindset & Push Through Your Discomfort
When you have a growth mindset and push through your discomfort, a couple of things will happen:
You will realize that it’s not as hard as you thought. We over-dramatize things that we’re afraid of. Pushing through fear will help you realize that the fear of something is not nearly as bad as the thing itself. Of course, it still may be hard—maybe even very hard—but you’ll realize that you can take baby steps into progress, and baby steps aren’t so scary.
You will get more ideas. It’s good to work creatively under a broad range of emotions. Each emotion “flavors” your work. For instance, what would happen if you only cooked with one spice? It might still taste good, but it would only ever reflect that one flavor. If you cooked with a broad range of spices, however, you’d get a broad range of flavors. Even tough emotions, like fear, can help you achieve something new and interesting. You just have to work despite the fear!
The truth is, fear will always be a part of life. There are famous performers who still get nervous before going on stage every single time. But they keep doing it anyway, because it’s worth it, and even though the fear might not entirely go away, they get used to feeling it and pushing through despite it.
Think about what happens when you lift heavy weights. It’s tough, and it makes your arms sore. It’s not comfortable. But, if you do it everyday, you will get stronger, and it won’t be as uncomfortable. Does the weight get lighter? Nope. It remains just as heavy as it ever was.The changing factor is you getting stronger!
So, even though fear will always be a part of life, the more we deal with it, the stronger we will become.
The happiness you will get from pursuing your passion and charging through the fear will outweigh any discomfort by a landslide.
Plus, fear doesn’t last forever. It’s usually the initial feeling you get before launching yourself out of your comfort zone, but as you get stronger, you will see for yourself that you can do hard things.
The Greatest Success Possible: Self-actualization. Self determination. Hard work. Achievement. Success. A pleased God. Reward.
I was on a church retreat recently that spoke on Jeremiah 2. During a quiet moment with the Lord, surrounded in a world of self-actualization and self-determination, a sudden hard truth impressed me. Regardless of your primary purpose or calling or destiny in this life, you’re actually incapable of doing it. Doesn’t matter what it is, you are incapable of performing the one thing you are created to do by design.
Despite your most intense focus, intention, and effort, you cannot glorify God. By your own efforts, you cannot please Him. Think about that and let it sink in. How could a finite and defective being, even one that’s been redeemed by Christ, ever please an infinite and perfect one? (Isaiah 64:6) By your own efforts, you cannot stop sinning. You cannot add one day to your life. And you cannot achieve anything at all truly great. You simply lack the capability to do so on your own.
We may immediately think of some superstar celebrity names that achieved greatness. Well greatness by our standards. Truly I tell you if they did it on their own then whatever they achieved was far less than what God designed them to be. They failed. Funny, the one thing we all were ultimately created for: to glorify God, is actually the one thing we are most incapable of doing.
Depressed? It may seem sad, but it’s by design.
“My people have committed two sins: they have forsaken me, the spring of living water. They have been for themselves cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” – Jeremiah 2:13
The harder you try to make yourself under your own power a usable cistern, the more useless you become to God. Even when grace saves you under Jesus, if you continue to power forward under your own might, you’ll fail to please Him.
Only God can glorify Himself. Only infinite and eternal can satisfy infinite and eternal.
So the only way you can please God, your actual ultimate destiny regardless of what your calling may be, is to be as humble as possible. Be honest with your inner core of your condition of a being as useful as a broken cistern, sinful and useless under your own strength.
“The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart O God.” – Psalm 51:17
It is through humbly becoming as much of a shell and clearing out your own determination, drive, and passions that God can finally fill Himself in you as a usable vessel. This is in stark contrast to our current culture’s understanding. It’s by breaking yourself down into a limp puppet that God can finally attach His strings. He brings you to true animated life. Then and only then when you have “self-actualized” yourself to what you really are (nothing) and have identified your greatest capability (completely incapable) is when God can finally assume control. He uses you for your real destiny. This will now be 100% by His hand alone and not one iota of your humanity.
Logically, the only thing we humans are ever in control of, is the first step: removing our pride. We were never in control and capable of anything. Under God’s rule and measurement of true success, our own power and strength exists for the sole purpose of removing our own power and strength. We are to make room for *His* power and strength. Hence, the greatest thing we could ever actually “do” for God is to “undo” ourselves.
This post won’t be possible without the inspiration and support of Jesse Hunter.
How to achieve more than you think you can, using Justin Timberlake as the perfect example.
Looking at it from the outside, little of how his career has progressed seems to make sense.
JT’s not someone you come across in headlines a whole lot, yet he sits on over 160 awards, a 200 million dollar fortune and one of the most respected reputations in the history of entertainment. At 36 years old, he’s had a globally successful band, four platinum solo albums, starred in the smash hit movies and is considered a fashion icon.
But that’s not what common sense tells us, is it? Though cautions have been added to the famous 10,000-hour rule, the message remains the same: you need lots of deliberate practice and years of time to get good at one thing.
So how can someone like Timberlake switch music styles, industries, even to a completely different skill set, like acting, time and time again, yet still succeed?
What part of the picture are we missing?
Learning To Unlearn
Every lesson in life comes at the expense of unlearning another.
When you learn to be confident, you unlearn to be shy. When you react with humility, you have forgotten your ego. When you’re comfortable taking the risk, you ignore other’s opinions, and so on.
In Chinese philosophy, the idea of Yin and Yang suggests that life consists entirely of dualities. It is only through the completeness of these dualities that we achieve unity. So no matter how contradictory two sides seem, they’re ultimately connected.
For each new piece of knowledge you acquire, you have to let go of an old one. Foggy clouds of ideas make way for facts, which make way for better facts, only to be replaced by new clouds, and so the cycle continues.
What most of us do when we try to improve is resist this cycle. We want every next answer to be the answer to everything. A different diet, a new sleep schedule, a tweak to your marketing — if only we stick to it, it may last us forever. Of course, nothing ever does.
That’s because the underlying skill of acquiring and abandoning knowledge, the unity, lies in change itself. What you’re really learning is how to unlearn.
“Do I contradict myself? Very well then, I contradict myself.”
The next time someone accuses you of being inconsistent, say this line. It’ll instantly take the wind out of their sails because you can’t argue with someone who accepts being wrong. Especially without making an attempt to defend themselves.
Most people stumble over this idea because one of our biggest innate desires is to be consistent. Add to that our tendency to spend more time on what we’ve already sunken energy into and you get a high level of resistance to unlearning.
People like Justin Timberlake, however, practice something cryptocurrency expert Nick Szabo calls quantum thought:
“In law school, they teach a very different way of thinking in that you need to take both the defendants and the plaintiffs side of the issue and run down the arguments as if each one of them is true. They contradict each other, of course, or at least the conclusions, and so I compare this to Schrodinger’s cat — maybe it’s alive, maybe it’s dead. Maybe the defendant’s guilty, maybe they’re not, and you have to keep both of these in your mind at once.”
When Justin went from child actor to boyband singer, from solo artist to actor, from show host to comedian, from R&B to Soul, and from commercial star to the voice actor, he was in no way convinced he’d be good at all of those things.
He just managed to hold the possibility of two different truths in his head at the same time. Thanks to this skill, Timberlake is never afraid to be wrong, since he is always free to unlearn one thing for another. He has a frictionless mind.
It’s a mental model he likely acquired at The Mickey Mouse Club.
A Child With A Grown Man’s Work Ethic
Even someone as talented as Justin Timberlake isn’t always right. He bought a golf course for $16 million, only to sell it for $500,000 seven years later, and some of his films were really bad. He works incredibly hard too, which we can’t neglect.“There’s a spelling bee and you have to spell the word ‘CAT.’ One student spells it ‘C-A-T.’ The person got it right. The next person spells it ‘K-A-T.’ That’s wrong.
And so we’ve built a system for ourselves where there is an answer and everything else is not the answer, even when some answers are better than others. So our brains are absent the wiring capable of coming up with an original thought.”
As adults, we spend all of our time in this system, so it’s almost impossible not to fall prey to the same thinking. But when we do, when we resist the process of constantly updating our view of the world, we block our own path.
Children aren’t burdened with this problem yet, because they’re still unfamiliar with the idea that “this is how we do things around here.” As Sir Ken Robinson recalls about the time his son was in the nativity play:
“The three boys came in, four-year-olds with tea towels on their heads, and they put these boxes down, and the first boy said, “I bring you gold.” And the second boy said, “I bring you myrrh.” And the third boy said, “Frank sent this.”
What these things have in common is that kids will take a chance. If they don’t know, they’ll have a go. Am I right? They’re not frightened of being wrong. I don’t mean to say that being wrong is the same thing as being creative. What we doknow is, if you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original.
And by the time they get to be adults, most kids have lost that capacity. They have become frightened of being wrong.”
What we really see when we look at someone of Justin Timberlake’s caliber, is a child with a grown man’s work ethic. Having traversed the long road of unlearning, he reaps the rewards of unencumbered thought: Originality, adaptability, and the courage to exercise both at a second’s notice.
If nobody told you what you can and can’t achieve in a 20-year career, how much would you dare to try?
Chances are you’d act with an open mind and, like Justin Timberlake, embrace the next line in Whitman’s poem:
“I am large, I contain multitudes.”
What a brilliant write-up. I highly acknowledge Niklas Goke for this wonderful piece of work and how his writing has impacted a lot of people including me.
You have goals for your 2019 which is just in a few days. Have different goals for your blog, family, work, social and community involvement and contribution as well. What kind of difference would you like to make in this world next year? What organizations, causes, needs, or social problems would you like to work on or in? What changes would you like to see? Who is there who is less fortunate than you that you would like to help?
If you were independently wealthy, what causes would you support? Most of all, what could you do today to begin making a difference in the world? Don’t wait until some future date when everything will b ideal. Instead, start today in some way.
Am happy to say welcome to 2019 guys because am already in 2019.
You are unbreakable, unstoppable and unbelievably powerful. In all situations, remember… YOU GOT THIS!
Do you ever have days where you wish you could take a break from being an adult?
You know… there’s actually a thing called “Adulting” (being an adult)…
“The practice of behaving in a way characteristic of a responsible adult, especially the accomplishment of mundane but necessary tasks.” “To carry out one or more of the duties and responsibilities expected of fully developed individuals.”
No wonder we want to get off that treadmill sometimes! ???????????? I know I do!
Don’t get my wrong… life is A-MA-ZING. But let’s keep it real… it is also freaking hard sometimes too!
So for those days when you’re not feeling up to this whole “Adulting” thing, I want you to remember…
YOU GOT THIS!
Even on the days you would rather crawl under your bed cover.
Even on the days when there are too many tasks to do and not enough time.
Even on the days when you boss is being unreasonable.
Even on the days when everyone is at you wanting something.
Even on the days when your body feels exhausted.
Even on the days when you have no idea what you’re meant to be doing, and you’re trying to look like you do!
One if the major reasons why I love to read, research and post on my blog platform is because I got the opportunity to spread good news and contribute to someone’s life daily.
I want to appreciate Bernadette for her continuous work and writings that inspires me to also be amongst the team of life coaches.
Maturity is many things. It is the ability to base a judgment on the big picture, the long haul.
It means being able to resist the urge for immediate gratification and opt for the course of action that will pay off later.
One of the characteristics of the young is “I want it now.”
Grown-up people can wait.
Maturity is perseverance–the ability to sweat out a project or a situation, in spite of heavy opposition and discouraging setbacks, and stick with it until it is finished.
The adult who is constantly changing friends and changing mates is immature. He/she cannot stick it out because he/she has not grown up.
Maturity is the ability to control anger and settle differences without violence or destruction. The mature person can face unpleasantness, frustration, discomfort and defeat without collapsing or complaining. He/she knows he cannot have everything his/her own way every time. He/she is able to defer to circumstances, to other people-and to time. He/she knows when to compromise and is not too proud to do so.
Maturity is humility. It is being big enough to say, “I was wrong.” And, when he/she is right, the mature person need not experience the satisfaction of saying, “I told you so.”
Maturity is the ability to live up to your responsibilities, and this means being dependable. It means keeping your word. Dependability is the hallmark of integrity. Do you mean what you say-and do you say what you mean? Unfortunately, the world is filled with people who cannot be counted on. When you need them most, they are among the missing. They never seem to come through in the clutches. They break promises and substitute alibis for performance. They show up late or not at all. They are confused and disorganized. Their lives are a chaotic maze of broken promises, former friends, unfinished business and good intentions that somehow never materialize. They are always a day late and a dollar short.
Maturity is the ability to make a decision and stand by it. Immature people spend their lives exploring endless possibilities and then doing nothing. Action requires courage. Without courage, little is accomplished.
Maturity is the ability to harness your abilities and your energies and do more than is expected. The mature person refuses to settle for mediocrity. He/she would rather aim high and miss the mark than low-and make it.
Maturity is the art of living in peace with that which cannot be changed, the courage to change that which should be changed, no matter what it takes, and the wisdom to know the difference.
There may be days when you get up in the morning and things aren’t the way you had hoped they would be. I experienced this in the past when I used to give up on my ideas and dreams, doubting myself and thinking otherwise. But i thank God, some few friends, and my fellow motivational bloggers on this platform.
So i had to tell myself things will get better. You also have to adopt that believe that everything will get better. There are times when people disappoint you and let you down. But those are the times when you must remind yourself to trust your own judgement and opinions, to keep your life focused on believing in yourself.
There will be challenges to face and changes to make in your life, and it is up to you to accept them.
The great and rich minds in the world never gave up on their ideas or dreams, no matter how difficult it was to accomplish, they pushed and believed that it was possible. “Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day.”
Constantly keep yourself headed in the right direction. It may not be easy at times, but in those times of struggle you will find a stronger sense of who you are. So when the days come that are filled with frustration and unexpected responsibilities, remember to believe in yourself and all you want your life to be.
Because the challenges and changes will only help you to find the goals that you know are meant to come true for you.
When and how it happen.
But never knew why it did…
Playing in the whiten pure snow,
Feels free with no darkness and envy,
Spins your body around with ease,
Until the year of your age pass,
The smoke and thick clouds surrounds you,
The whiten snow in which you are stepping on turns dry,
Piece by piece inside you starts to die,
The ground cracks and you fall,
Fall and fall,
The lights fades further away,
Don’t know where to grab,
Don’t know where to stay,
Cannot run, cannot hide,
Because the darkness, are already inside,
Too alone to scream,
Should you still now follow your dream?
You stumped into a dark pitch forest,
None colour of white,
Not even a beam of light,
You stand up,
Try to find a way out,
No clue of how many years passed,
You gave up,
Struggled to get use to it,
A loud roar you heard,
A light of flame you see,
What is it going to be?
You run towards,
A humongous dragon,
Firing the forest,
The light you have not seen for so long,
No weapon to fight,
But the determination becomes your shield,
And your bravery becomes your armor,
It is never meant to slay,
You run and climb on to it,
and made it fly,
Fly and find where you have fallen,
Fly into the sky and you try,
to fight more for freedom..
To fulfill your life with justice,
while you fly up high
All the stupidity,
the ignorant of human nation,
which cannot be stopped unless they know what pain is,
is that what it called eternity?
You defeated the darkness and you finally fly,
maybe its not darkness,
but a blessing in disguise….
It was like a dream, when I felt my mind left the reality world into an imaginary scene.
One evening, I was heading for a meeting that will transform my life and family to become a partner in a law firm. As I was driving I noticed I was the only one on the road. The environment was like “silent hill” quiet and horrifying. Out of the blues, I saw a very big image of a man standing some distance in front of me. I stopped and tried to glimpse at the image, I couldn’t see anything. Fear came drumming on me, my mind became a battlefield. The first voice told me to go back, do I want to die. The other said move forward, you have to complete your mission, remember you were deprived for long to get this position, you have worked hard, this is your time. I was confused and stood beside my car for like 10 minutes. I began to seek God’s presence in prayer to reveal who is the giant blocking my way. Then a word came to me to look at king David as an example. I opened my Bible and began to read.
The war between the Israelites and the Philistines in1 Samuel 17, the outcome of which is determined by David’s confidence in meeting the challenge of Goliath. The Israelites were full of fear when the Philistines had a giant who was there number one fighter. They tried to retreat back to there camps. But with faith David came forth and said he will challenge the giant. After reading, I gained confidence and my faith grew stronger. It’s like the giant image was reading my confidence, it came out of the shadow to reveal itself. It was a giant, a scary big man with a sword just like Goliath. I wore my armour of faith and confidence, got into my car, ready to destroy anything blocking my goals, future, and greatness. The giant spoke saying “where do I think am going to, do I want to die today. There is no way for you to pass, go back.” When he saw I wasn’t responding to his threats, the giant started running, approaching me very fast. I at the other hand started my engine, and moved with a full speed. As I was moving, I didn’t feel myself in a car anymore, it was like the the car transformed to a very powerful weapon. As we collided, the giant in my front was no more. I came out of the car giving praise and worship to God my protector.
Don’t let fear steal your hardwork, don’t give up on life when things becomes hard. Keep moving forward and you will see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Finally, brothers, whatever istrue, whatever ishonorable, whatever isjust, whatever ispure, whatever islovely, whatever iscommendable, if there is anyexcellence, if there isanything worthy of praise,think about these things.What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:8-9, ESV)
What drives you to get up in the morning and chase your dreams? Why are you working until 10PM on a weekend? Why are you at home working when you could be out partying or hanging out with friends? It’s easy to get lost in your own head and allow procrastination to put your dreams in a standstill.
A few quotes to get you fired up…
“Good things happen to those who hustle.” – Anais Nin
“My entire life can be summed up in four word: I hustled. I conquered. ” – Unknown
“The dream is free. The hustle is sold separately.” – Unknown
“You must either modify your dreams or magnify your skills.” – Jim Rohn
I don’t want to take shortcuts to achieve my dreams. I want to take the long road; the road full of mistakes and bad choices and moments of despair. The road that seems longer and longer as the days go by and the road that almost makes me give up but forces me to fight harder.
I want the long road because it’s the journey that makes you want the dream even more and it’s the journey that will give your dream meaning and it’s the journey that will truly change your life.
I want a journey that’s full of struggles, obstacles, surprises, heart breaks, laughter, tears and battles. I want scars and bruises. I want signs that I fought for my dream, that I learned how to make it happen, that I didn’t settle and that I survived whatever tried todestroy me.
I don’t want to take shortcuts to find love. I want to fall in love with a lot of wrong people and get heartbroken a few times, because this is how you grow, this how you become wiser and this is when you learn how to be compassionate, how to be kind and how fragile our hearts can be.
I want to have bad examples to learn from, and people I can’t forget along the way, I want to look back on all those I’ve loved and understand why it never lasted and why it never worked out, but more than anything, I want these people to be living proof that I’m still capable of loving, I’m still capable of trying and I’m still capable of forgiving .
I want them to be a sign of my strength, of how I put myself first when I walked away and how I found a way to love myself even if they didn’t love me back. I want them to be memories of who I used to be and who I’m becoming and I want them to be the reason why I’ll be the best possible person for the one I’ll end up with.
I don’t want to take shortcuts to make friends. I want to meet all kinds of people, I want to meet who don’t resemble me at all and learn to accept and love their differences and I want to meet people who are so much like me to know that I’m not alone and that someone out there was sent along to be on the same path with me so we can lean on each other.
I want to talk to strangers about life and experiences and learn from their wisdom and I want to be around people who make the world a better place. People who dream, people who love, people who want to make a difference and people who are trying to make the best out of their lives.
I want to find them after I’ve been around people who let me down, people who made me feel alone, people who judged me because they couldn’t understand me and people who didn’t believe in me, because this is how you learn to distinguish between the real ones and the fake ones and this is how you learn not to let yourself be defined by what other people think of you.
I don’t want to take shortcuts to anything worth having because shortcuts make you miss the beauty of the road, the surprises you see on the way, the people you meet in traffic and the pretty views you drive by when the road is long. Shortcuts make the drive quick and unexciting but the real road is full of surprises, full of bumps, full of incidents that will teach you something and full of moments that can change your life. You don’t learn how to drive so you can take shortcuts; you learn how to drive so you can take the real road, the highway and handle any circumstances you face on the way.
Shortcuts can sometimes lead to dead ends but the long road is endless.
Steven Spielberg had his share of failures and setbacks before becoming successful. So did Walt Disney and Michael Jordan. Arianne Huffington, Jeff Bezos and Bill Gates experienced many ups and downs before they became successful in their respective fields. Henry Ford and Steve Jobs also had a bumpy journey to success. These icons are perfect examples that the road to success is anything but smooth.
Failure is inescapable and inevitable. There is no denying it or escaping it. No one is immune to it. No matter how good you are in your field or area of expertise, there is no guarantee or immunity against failure nor is there a surety that you’ll succeed the first time around or make it every single time.
Failure is bitter no matter how you see it. The sting of a letdown, the agony of experiencing disappointment and the pain of defeat is hard to endure. In plain words, failure sucks. It crushes you, hurts you deeply and leaves your ego bruised. There is no feeling worse than having hit rock bottom. No wonder everyone dreads failure, but keep in mind that no amount of hating or detesting it can help you avoid it.
Failure is a part of life and the success process. J.K Rowling, the bestselling author with the phenomenal rags to riches story, has beautifully summed it with this line: ‘It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all. In which case, you fail by default.’
But, failure doesn’t have to discourage, demoralize you or end your success journey. Looking at it in the right perspective, failure doesn’t mean it’s all over. It just means that you didn’t succeed this time around.
Sometimes you’ll face situations where the odds are stacked up against you. Other times, despite your best efforts and preparation, you will still experience failure. You have to train yourself to be tough, take the hits and be able to deal with it all.
Failure can work for you big time if you look at it the right way. It, by itself, is not detrimental. What is damaging about failure is its paralyzing effect once you let it get to you. Your chances of recovering from failure and regaining lost confidence depend heavily on how you approach it.
Failure doesn’t care about how you feel. It makes no concessions. It only throws two choices in your way: either give up or fight again. It’s up to you to decide and take the call. You can choose to opt for the easy way out, step back and quit or make the hard choice of picking yourself up, getting back on your feet and starting all over again. The right choice will help you steer yourself towards success and transform your life.
Here are 11 ways you can bounce back from failure and get back on track again.
1 Accept what happened
The first thing you should do after you have failed is to accept it and come to terms with it. Don’t ignore, deny or hide it. You have failed and there’s nothing you can do to reverse it now.
Accept it and know that it’s okay. Failure happens all the time. It’s no big deal if you accept it and decide to do something about it. That’s how you start learning how to overcome failure.
2 Take total responsibility
Own your failure. There’s no shame in it. Everyone fails sometimes.
Things won’t always pan out the way you want them, but the sole responsibility should always be yours to take. You must be accountable for your actions, choices, and decisions. Never blame others and hold them responsible for your failures. Passing the buck is a sure recipe for disaster.
3 Analyze what happened
You cannot undo what happened, but, by taking stock of what happened, you can dispassionately assess and gain insight into what went wrong and where. It will also enable you to understand what worked and what didn’t so that you can begin with a whole new approach.
Analyzing can help you in revising your strategy, preparing yourself, working on your weak points and improving your future performance. It will also give you the confidence to bounce back and begin more confidently.
4 Learn from your mistakes
There is much truth in the words of Henry Ford when he said that the only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. Failure teaches you like none other can teach you. You must learn from your mistakes and ‘heed the lessons of failure’, as Bill Gates put it.
Make the best of your mistakes. Embrace them, learn from them and never repeat them. Identify your weaknesses, work on them and turn them into your strength.
5 Don’t dwell on failure
The worst way to deal with failure is to take it to heart. What has happened has happened. No amount of crying, complaining or regretting can help you overcome it.
So, stop ruminating over it, re-running it in your mind and feeling sorry for yourself. It will not serve any useful purpose and will only take you deeper into sorrow and unhappiness.
6 Get over it; Move on
Failure is ‘a temporary detour, not a dead-end’, as Denis Waitley, the American bestselling author is once known to have said. Failure only lasts until you succeed again. So, don’t let it become permanent and scar your psyche.
A negative feeling cannot have any positive outcome. It is best forgotten. Wipe the slate clean and make a fresh start. Look ahead, move on, and give yourself a chance to recover and rebuild yourself.
7 Develop mental toughness to triumph over failure
Setbacks should not dishearten or break you. Failure is not an end in itself so, don’t let it steal your confidence. Train yourself to take bad hits in life. Use failure to learn, grow and better yourself. Maintain a positive attitude in the face of failure. That’s how you can strengthen your mental toughness.
8 Jump into a positive frame of mind
When you face defeat, you are engulfed by fear and self-doubt. Failure brings with it a dark cloud of negativity. You begin to question yourself and start to doubt your ability. Positive thoughts are the last thing on your mind and that’s how it is. Recovery and rebounding
Recovery and rebounding take time. To facilitate and make the process faster, you must fight all negative thoughts that cross your mind and fill yourself with positivity. Look back and reflect on your own life how you faced past failures and overcame them.
Nothing can inspire you more than your personal experience and your own success story. You know you have dealt with it before and can do it again.
9 Let go of fear
When you experience failure, one thing is sure. The worst has struck you, but things can’t go bad from there.
When you fall down, you can’t go further down. So, what is there to fear?
From there, you can only move towards the positive direction. So, get up, gather your broken pieces and start building yourself again. Success is achieved by those who don’t fear failure. Don’t let failure hold you back or stop you from realizing your dreams.
10 Focus on bettering yourself
Everyone faces failure but how you look at it and what you do about it is what makes all the difference. In most cases, failure happens because a person wasn’t able to prepare well, didn’t plan properly or was ill-equipped. It can also be because he’s just plain unlucky.
Disregarding the last one, everything else can be fixed. So, make a list of all the things which you think contributed to your failure and start working on them, one thing at a time. Do everything within your power to rectify, resolve, improve, develop and put right.
11 Begin again
Failure can devastate you if you allow it to. It can also help you rebuild yourself and restart your journey if you choose to.
Failure shouldn’t be the end of your dreams, goals, and aspirations. The power of failure should motivate you to chase your goals, take a fresh start and make a new beginning. Let failure make you stronger, tougher and more resilient so that you don’t just survive it but you’ll bounce back stronger.